my name is joanne
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Thursday, November 30, 2006



photo write-up: simply done in 15mins. not much work. the usual maple leaves and lyrics to a song. i need more ideas!!


* If anyone wants me to do a collage or photoshop of their graphic(s) for them, contact me thru email, msn or friendster :)

Wednesday, November 29, 2006



photo write-up: my 5th proud creation, using photoshop. love the font.. downloaded it off the net. did blotches of rainbow in the background. pic was originally brown. the fairy in her hand isnt 'real'. its just a figurine. hope u like the magic touch i've added to it :)

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Small town homecoming queen
Shes the star in this scene
Theres no way to deny shes lovely
Perfect skin perfect hair
Perfumed hearts everywhere
Tell myself that inside shes ugly
Maybe I'm just jealous
I can't help but hate her
Secretly I wonder if my boyfriend wants to date her


She is the prom queen
I'm in the marching band
She is a cheerleader
I'm sittin in the stands
She gets the top bunk
I'm sleepin on the floor
Shes Miss America
and I'm just the girl next door

Senior class president
She must be heaven sent
She was never the last one standing
A backseat debutaunt
Everything that you want
Never to harsh or too demanding
Maybe I'll admit it
I'm a little bitter
Everybody loves her
but I just wanna hit her


She is the prom queen
I'm in the marching band
She is a cheerleader
I'm sittin in the stands
She gets the top bunk
I'm sleepin on the floor
Shes Miss America
and I'm just the girl next door

I don't know why I'm feelin sorry for myself
I spend all my time wishin that I was someone else

Monday, November 27, 2006

no one understands.



photo write-up: featuring nickelback's 'rockstar' lyrics. pic is of some random girl band. no maple leaves this time, just stars. i like the font.



photo write-up: this image is really random. was experimenting with brushes and out came this swirly thing, which i drew.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

dear friend,

can i even call you that? there's so much i wish i could tell you. it'd only be fair, after all you've shared with me. maybe its not much, but i somehow feel guilty.. holding back from you. till this day i dont fully quite comprehend as to why im doing this. i only know that this is what i must do.

3 hours. what difference does that make to me, i ask myself. it shouldnt be such a big deal. it shouldnt. yet it is. maybe thats just the way i am. selfish. jealous. me.

im not making any sense now am i? forgive me, i dont even understand myself. these thoughts are threatening to spill out of my head.

im drowning.


part of me wants to be mad at you. part of me wants to scream at you. bitch about you. curse you. hate you. oh god, with friends like me you wouldnt need enemies.

but i cant do that. we are, after all, 'friends'.

someday ill tell you. someday you'll find out. but it wont be today. nor tomorrow. nor anytime soon.

that lingering suspicion you had? yes, you're right. you're absolutely right.

forgive me.

good night.



photo write-up: second attempt at photoshop. inspired by anna nalick's breathe (see the mtv on the right on this blog). i had to resize the pic here, which is probably why u cant see the words clearly. am loving the maple leaves!! :)

Saturday, November 25, 2006



photo write-up: this is my first attempt at adobe photoshop. i blurred the picture. it depicts a girl, face down in pink and black striped socks. for brushes, i used maple leaves and falling stars. heart is drawn in by myself, as well as the pink paint like brush strokes on the right.

sometimes i really feel like i have no life, looking at others.

have been bitten by the sudden travel bug.

please take me to paris!









Friday, November 24, 2006



photo write-up: this graphic of the eiffel tower was originally pink, but i inverted the colours and it turned out green. the falling stars that u see in the background were drawn in by me, they weren't there previously. the graphic is saved in bitmat format, which enabled me to achieve the blurred effect.



photo write-up: again i inverted this graphic, which was originally brown, in order to give it a more gothic feel. the fairy appears to glow. the spiderweb is done entirely by me. also added in some emo-ish sounding lyrics. there is a deeper interpretation to this graphic - the girl is 'trapped', though not literally. hence, the spiderweb.

more graphics to come.... :)

Thursday, November 23, 2006

inspired by steph and marian.

omg chocolatessssssss

lol.



like it?

this one took some time to make, cos i had trouble arranging the graphics.

I tried to be perfect
But nothing was worth it

I don't believe it makes me real
I thought it'd be easy
But no one believes me
I meant all the things I said

If you believe it's in my soul
I'd say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I'm trying to let you know
That I'm better off on my own

This place is so empty
My thoughts are so tempting
I don't know how it got so bad
Sometimes it's so crazy
That nothing can save me
But it's the only thing that I have

Monday, November 20, 2006

so i went running yesterday.

whoopie.

and i actually saw some improvement. am proud of myself.

its hard to start exercising again after quitting for over a yr.

but i try to imagine all that excess weight slipping off, and just keep going.


my skirt felt looser today :)

Sunday, November 19, 2006

emo boys.


30 seconds to mars


my chemical romance


sugarcult


new found glory


plain white t's



taking back sunday


yellowcard


panic! at the disco


green day

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

dear you,

i think you're awesome.

u rock my socks.

u make me happy.

u surprise me.

u intrigue me.

you're wonderful.

thanks for making my day night.

*HUGS*

Sunday, November 12, 2006

this is an interesting article. have a read - girls especially! :)


The Chemistry of Love

Unlike most of the cliches about love and romance, evidence that love at first sight really does exist can be documented. Scientists might argue, however, that it's a specific kind of love...infatuation to be exact... that causes this incredible sensation. The excitement and nervousness accompanying an instant crush is intense, too intense they argue to survive the time and patience a long lasting relationship demands.

Look through your favourite magazine and you'll see fragrances advertised that boast of being laced with pheromones, the odourless airborne molecules researchers believe are behind that gushy, giddy first look. Recent studies are exploring the notion that love may be ruled as much by these molecules as it is driven by emotion. The physiological component is so powerful, some researchers believe, that within ten years there could be a brain chemical nasal spray manufactured to enhance love between a couple!

Doctors have compared falling in love with the feeling you get after eating lots of chocolate. As your body releases a load of hormones combined with the neurotransmitter dopamine, you feel a rush, a natural high. Your pupils dilate, your heart pumps harder, you start to sweat, even the glands in your scalp release oil to create extra shine. It's almost the identical response your body would have if you were afraid or angry. Scientists call it "the fight or flight response," only here you don't want to fight or flee.

The good news is that the knowledge of neuroscience is doubling every two and a half years, meaning that scientists have learned more than all prior humans about the working of the brain in the last two and a half years. They are excited about the possibility of understanding exactly what it is that ignites the spark that melts our hearts. The bad news is that the number of flip-flops your stomach does upon meeting someone has nothing to do with the kind of love that the fairy tales promise.

All the studies in the world can't change the fact that the honeymoon state of love at first sight doesn't last. Real life intrudes and annoying habits, human frailties, and serious character flaws come into play. Suddenly you notice that he wears funny shoes and talks way too much about Premier League Football. As the spell of crazy hormones dissipates, you see the size of his ego. As passion releases its grip, you see he is definitely not The One.

Real love takes time and patience and a whole lot more than being swept off your feet. It involves knowing one another in a deeper, more profound way. That can't happen in an instant. So, while you are waiting for that honest, intelligent, compassionate and kind prince to come along – if you get a chance to inhale some of those magical pheromones, enjoy!!

Source: www.beinggirl.com.sg

EXHAUSTED!!!

im back from malaysia, or more specifically johor. just a one day 'adventure'.

got 3 tops and 1 black leggings (yes steph.. like finally. now all i need are long tops 2 go with it lol) from johor's biggest shopping mall, which totally reminds me of vivocity.

still i kinda regret going, cos it was so rushed. luckily, did not get caught in much of a jam at the causeway.

im not getting enough sleep. hardly slept on weds (insomnia i think), slept for 5hrs on thurs and 4hrs on fri.

omg another monotonous wk of sch is fast approaching. why do i feel like i've just wasted my weekend again?

Friday, November 10, 2006

i want to make a new year's resolution. yes i know its early, but fuck it.

wanna get this down so i wont forget when 2007 comes around.

i never, never want to take anything for granted anymore.

i've had enough with all the regrets. enough with all the wishing that i'd appreciated this and that more.

i'm fed up with myself.

don't wanna think abt it anymore. am tired of blaming myself and blaming others for not doing more.

I've got it all but I feel so deprived
I go up I come down and I'm emptier inside
Tell me what is this thing that I feel like I'm missing
And why can't I let go

There's gotta be more to life
Than chasing that every temporary high to satisfy me

Cause the more that I'm
Tripping out thinking there must be more to life
Well it's life but I'm sure
There's gotta be more than wanting more

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

im so fed up with this semester's timetable.

hardly any time for myself.. and its back to night lessons again.. damn..

i never really appreciated holidays.. and still don't quite yet know how to.

Monday, November 06, 2006

i just want you to hold me tight as i cry so that

the tears will wash away all the sorrow and i

may forget for just one moment that im alive,

lying here so still in your arms and drifting away.




this image is inspired by avril lavinge's fall to pieces.
features the chorus of the song and numerous crying people.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

im an aspiring designer.. support me!!!

haha.

this is the first collage. more to come.
so watch this space :)

i went running this evening.

yes, i cant believe i actually got down to it. well, it was on my to-do list after exams.

its been a year and probably more since i actually ran a significant distance. so of course its no surprise that im bloody unfit. arghhh.

so ran around my neighbourhood.. everything sure looks different at night. went to check out the other park.. which is kind of far from my house.

took a few breaks in between when i started to get out of breath and got stitches.. didnt bring my phone along so imagine if i collapsed from exhaustion or something. haha.

and as i was running that feeling started coming back.. u know, the one when u feel that strain and ache in your body.. the stretch in your legs..

and oh gosh.. was sweating and sweating and sweating. which explains why i downed 3 cups of juice once i got home 45 minutes later.

sugar rush + replenishment!!

dont know when ill be able to find time to go running again.. after all, sch is starting on mon. but ill try for once a week.

where did i ever find the discipline to run like 3-4 times per week last time? public transport has made me lazy.

i hope ill be able to get out of bed tmr, and my legs dont cramp up.

i really try my hardest and best, and yet you still refuse to accept it.

you refuse to believe that it is my best.

even after i squeeze out every single tiny drop of effort. if is not enough for you.

what more can i do?

i just wish you'd try to understand me and the position im in.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

"those who say money cant buy happiness just don't know where to shop"

lol. hey.. that does have a tinge or truth to it.. for me at least.

shopping is my salvation! it dont really matter whether i buy anything or not. just getting out of the house and strolling down orchard rd is enough to cheer me up.

it lets me breathe and relax.

no, seriously!

so yesterday i went town with ling zhi. we walked and walked and walked from 3pm to 8pm. aching feet! but sure was worth it.

great to meet up with old friends.. the catching up and all.

shopping wont make all the problems miraculously disappear, but at least temporarily. thank god for tiny blessings like these. and friends of course.

i hope it'll get better soon.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

my dad used to scold me for 'sweeping my problems under the rug'...

i remember now. and how appropriate it is at this moment. in case u don't get it, it means refusing to confront ur problems and acting as if they don't exist, temporarily until they somehow resurface again.

im still doing that now.. with my personal life and less so (in my opinion) with regards to my studies.

things that i've tried so awfully hard not to face, not to think abt.. well... guess it resurfaced today. and i was caught unprepared.

what a great way to start off the month huh.

im sure its not hard to understand.. everyone has stuff they simply want to avoid, cos thinking abt it or confronting it does nothing but bring pain. maybe i've skirted the issue for too long already. my time is due then.

given the choice as to whether i could backtrack and relive today i would, only so that i could push the problem back into its dark corner. i know in the future ill have to face it, but not now. just not now.

a bit of digression: im sorry that i cant reveal much here.. as u know this blog serves as an outlet for my frustrations.. not some tell-it-all column. so whoever is reading this, i hope u understand my need for some 'privacy'.

yes, i am worrying too early. i am paranoid.
yes i am.
but is there any harm in thinking for the future?

i feel upset that things have to turn out this way. i am angry with God for this. it isnt fair. why do some pple have it so easy?

pls cut the crap that im blessed and am so fortunate. fuck all that. the grass is greener on the other side.

i wanna cross over.




So I might try, to leave it all behind
I know tomorrow's not so bright now
I'll say goodbye, cause nothing good can last
You wear and fade you're nowhere fast

And today, I don't know how
To keep it all inside
But I guess I'll let it slide

And today, I don't know why
I thought that it was real
But I guess it's no big deal

I still believe it when you say
It's another perfect day
Another perfect day

For every girl who is tired of being weak when she is strong,
there is a boy tired of appearing strong when he is vulnerable.

For every boy who is burdened with the constant expectation of knowing everything,
there is a girl who is tired of people not trusting her intelligence.

For every girl who is tired of being called over-sensitive,
there is a boy who fears to be gentile, to weep.

For every boy whose competition is the only way to prove his masculinity,
there is a girl who is called unfeminine when she competes.

For every boy struggling not to let advertising dictate his desires,
there is a girl facing the ad industry's attacks on her self-esteem.

For every girl who takes a step toward her liberation,
there is a boy who finds the way to freedom a little bit easier.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

ok, ill say it again.. im so FED UP with life.

i dont understand why is it whenever i anticipate something, and am so looking forward to it, it somehow screws up.

like ALL THE TIME.

what the fuck??

so maybe i should just stop hoping and stop waiting.



i don't deal with disappointments easily.



I want to go back to when boys meant 'yuck' and friends were new,
dreams were unshattered, and worries few.
When recess was too short and life was too long,
and decisions came easy without the need to belong.
When storks delivered babies and passions weren't so strong,
friendships weren't broken, right was right and wrong was wrong.
When bad things didn't happen and only skinned knees brought tears,
and the night light in its socket quieted all our fears.