if u asked me last time what i thot was the worst thing in the world, i'd have said rejection. but now i've changed my mind. its SECRETS.
u love em, and u hate em.
currently im hating them more than loving them. sure, initially its fun keeping ur lil secret 2 yourself, but after awhile, it gets tiring always having 2 watch ur back.
i know what ur thinking..stop. i didnt commit some serious murder or anything. no no no. of course not. but i do have my fair share of secrets.
doesn't everyone?
"i'll keep u my dirty little secret
don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret"
anyway back 2 the pt. i hate hate absolutely hate keeping secrets now.
so many times i feel like just letting it all out... you know..
"i can't stand that ur always _________________. ur my friend, but i hate it when u ______________________. could u pls stop???"
"can u just stop asking? the reason is bcoz _____________________________"
"i'm miserable bcoz ______________________________ and i don't know what to do. can u help me?"
"could u just shut up? i don't feel like seeing u, talking to u, let alone being nice 2u"
the lines r fill in the blanks. sometimes i just wanna say this kind of stuff 2 pple, but obviously i cant. coz they don't know anything. besides, i'd only hurt them.
it sucks keeping secrets 2 yourself, coz there's no one u can turn to. when u face a problem, u gotta deal with it yourself.
"then y bother 2 keep secrets?", you ask. the answer 4 me is simple: some things r just better left unsaid. or unknown. im just complaining abt the burden tt secrets carry with them. and when it gets 2 burdensome, u find yourself letting things slip easily. SIGH.
the only gd thing i can say abt secrets now is tt "what pple don't know won't kill them". if they don't know, they won't ask/question u.
the past few days havent been exactly wonderful. i screwed up alot. i made a hell lot of mistakes. and a hell lot of regrets.
just let me wallow in self pity now. bye